Serperior And Lilligant's Sexy Adventure
by Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus
Summary: So I herd that people like Serperior And Lilligant together... well, you guys wanted it, so you better enjoy it. Nah, I'm just kidding, but anyway, this is how you don't start a relationship. I mean, a friendship. A whatever. I left the toaster on.
1. Chapter 1

**Serperior And Lilligant's Sexy Adventure**

Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus: Well, thanks to /vp/, I made this as a request. Will I update that certain /vp/ fanfic? maybe, but for now, I got a lot of writing to do.

Disclaimer: Everything belong to their owners.

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Serperior was hanging around in some random, perfectly smooth grassy meadows with his bro Krokorok, both of them simply enjoying the pleasure of walking around. However, Serperior felt something, a disturbance in the force. Krokorok scratched his head as he walked forwards, confronting Serperior and asking what was happening.

"Hmmhmmhmm... I have this... strange feeling..." Serperior mutrered as he rubbed his chin with his tail.

"What's up, Serperior?" Krokorok asked as he opened up his arms together.

Serperior frowned as he glanced behind him, then looked at Krokorok. "Well, croco mah boi, it's just... you see that Lilligant nearby?"

Krokorok turned behind, seeing the Lilligant that Serperior mentioned. "Yeah, what about her?"

Serperior smirked as he looked up, his tail moving slyly. "Well... let's just say... I got these... feelings for her..."

Krokorok chuckled, folding his arms together. "Oooh, the feeling for love?"

"Love?" Serperior remarked as he blinked several times.

Krokorok moved his hands in a slow motion. "You know, when you feel warm, cuddly, cozy..."

Serperior chuckled nervously as he rubbed his neck. "Oh. That. Well..." He sighed as he looked up, looking at the white, puffy clouds above. "I could go ahead with it, but I would look odd... don't you think?"

Krokorok laughed as he waved his hands, reassuring Serperior. "Don't worry about it! I'm behind you one hundred percent!" He then jumped into the bushes, popping his head out as he gave Serperior a thumbs up. "Go for it, mah boi!"

Serperior sighed as he slithered forwards, gulping as he had doubt in the back of his mind.

Lilligant was sitting on the nice, smooth grass, looking up at the clear blue sky with a cheery smile across her face. Lilligant's stomach growled loudly, causing Lilligant to blush in embarrassment as she rubbed her stomach with both her leafy arms, unaware of what was going to happen. Serperior then wrapped his long scaly body around Lilligant, squeezing her. Lilligant screamed in shock as she was caught by surprise.

"What the- gah!" Lilligant tried breaking free, but she panted several times, still struggling to get out. Serperior's grip got tighter, prompting Lilligant to give up as she sighed, feeling exhausted. Serperior chuckled as Lilligant looked up, still shocked.

"I like that you still tried giving it your all after I squeezed you." Serperior commented as he winked at Lilligant. "I can appreciate that."

Lilligant shook her head as she pulled her arms out, pouting, "You appreciate that? You came out of nowhere and tightened me like a rag doll!"

Serperior chuckled as he snarkly remarked, "Ohoho, but I haven't even came. In fact, I was thinking of that later..."

Lilligant's blush got bigger as her jaw dropped. "Wha- are you hitting on me?"

Serperior shook his head as he was caught by surprise. "Nononono! It's just that... ugh..." He then closed his eyes, muttering to himself, "Damn it, I'm really letting myself go. Who writes this drivel, anyway?"

Back in the bushes, Kokorok glanced next to him, to see a Scrafty typing on a laptop. Krokorok shrugged as Serperior groaned, rolling his eyes.

Lilligant pushed Serprerior off of her, heading towards the western direction as she folded her arms, degrading Serperior, "Humph! If I wanted to get a date, I would be kidnapped every single day of my life!"

Suddenly, right on the spot, she was snatched by a quick, sinister Cofagrigus, who laughed as he tightened his grip on Lilligant. Lilligant screamed in horror and pain as Serperior gasped, rushing towards Lilligant's aid.

"This is ridiculous! I just got crushed, and now I'm crushed again!" Lilligant demoaned as she struggled.

The Cofagrigus laughed as he poked Lilligant, taunting her, "Don't bother moving, my dear. Soon, the seven Chaos Pokeballs will be mine, and I will make the Cofagrigus Empire! Ohohohoho!" He then disappeared underneath the earth, taking Lilligant with him, who screamed for her life.

Serperior gasped in shock, looking at Krokorok, who didn't have anything to contribute. Serperior turned around, squinting his eyes as he muttered heroically, "There's only one thing to do..."

He then started sucking on his tail, wheeling back and forth as Krokorok facepalmed.


	2. Chapter 2

Serperior slithered as fast as he could, following the Cofagrigus that snatched Lilligant. Serperior attempted firing blasts of Solar Beam at Cofagrigus, but much of them didn't have any effect. As they left the peaceful wide open meadows, the chasing Pokemon headed into a rugged area, leading up to a very active volcano.

"Don't worry, Lilligant! I'll rescue you!" Serperior shouted as he started huffing, the rough terrain being harsh on his slick body, "Urph... I need a drink, or something."

Lilligant rolled her eyes in disdain. "You claim to rescue me, yet you already tire out. Some hero you are!"

Serperior obviously took insultage to that, as he was going faster. He then got a brilliant idea and grabbed Cofagrigus with his tail, pulling the ghost type coffin like Pokemon close as he attempted to free Lilligant. Cofagrigus, however, used his two top arms to break Serperior's grip off, vanashing in an instant as Lilligant disappeared with him. Serperior dropped his jaw in disbelief as he was distraught at what just happened.

"Ack! Lilligant, no!" Serperior exclaimed as he felt like he was going into jepoardy. "Why was I too slow enough to get her?"

"It's because you're pathetic, Serperior." A snooping Swoobat commented as she flapped overhead Serperior. "Why, if I knew better, you're downright pathetic."

"I am not!" Serperior shouted back as he wrapped his body around Swoobat, crushing her with great power. "If I was, you'd be nothing but dust right now!"

"Okay, okay!" The Swoobat gasped as she tried breaking apart from Serperior. "I take it back. Just please don't squeeze me!"  
Serperior growled as he released Swoobat, still unsure about her.

The Swoobat sighed as he shook herself, clearing her throat as she explained, "If you really wanted that plant chick, you should have gone straight after her. After all, she is fine and dandy."

"You know of her?" Serperior asked curiously as he stared blankly at the Swoobat.

The Swoobat scoffed, bending her right wing at Serperior in a playful manner. "Do I? I have tea parties with her every Thursday."

Serperior chuckled as he rubbed his chin with his tail, his interest perked. "Well, isn't that something?"

Swoobat laughed, flapping overhead of Serperior. "I know, right? Anyway, let's cut to the chase. We got to go in there and rescue her. Are you with me?"

"Am I? Let's do this, girl!" Serperior exclaimed, thrill to get a new partner to help him.

And thus, Serperior and Swoobat became close friends that day. Forever buddies. Ass kicking, suave buddies. And that's awesome.


End file.
